@everyone | dated to when the creatures started showing up

[thearchangel]

Hey, so - head's up. Not sure what's going on here, but if anyone sees a weird looking animal, four legs, two little arms coming out of the chest?

Watch your wallet.

I'm serious. Those things steal your credits - or whatever you're using as currency here. No clue how they do it. I mean, they're not dangerous, they're just irritating.

They're from our neck of the universe. I think humans call them "shifty-looking cows".

That's it. PSA from the milky way.

Comments

[thearchangel]

Yeah? What do cows actually look like?

[nadine_he_loves]

You know those black and white four legged hoofed animals in my domain? With horns, they're about the size of horses...

That's a cow.

[thearchangel]

...




Why the hell do we call these things cows?

[earthborn]

SPACE cow. space

[princessvegas]

Do you milk them??

[earthborn]

What? No. Typically I get by on just not shooting them.

Do you want to milk them?

[princessvegas]

No. But normally you can milk a cow. Maybe that's why they're named that. For milk reasons.

[earthborn]

[She had... genuinely never considered that.]

I've never considered that.

[And she never wants to consider it again.]

Look, if you wanna figure this out, be my guest. As far as I know, they were probably named by some random xeno-biologist that thought they were funny. Just don't blame me when anything you got in your pockets isn't there when you leave.

[princessvegas]

I'll pass. I got no interest in space critters. I was just pointing out that they can probably be milked.

[thearchangel]

... Milk?

[princessvegas]

Yeah. Milk comes from cows. Well, most milk, anyway.

[thearchangel]

[And thanks to Nadine...]

You get a liquid.

From an animal.

[princessvegas]

Yes? That's what dairy is. What, are you a vegan?

[thearchangel]

Uh, no. Non-human, actually.

[princessvegas]

And your... species? doesn't use "animal" products?

Don't get touchy, I just don't know what you are or what your people consider to be animals.

[thearchangel]

No, we do.

But the 'milk' thing is uh. That's new.

[nadine_he_loves]

I have no idea. Did people forget what cows are?

[thearchangel]

You're asking the wrong guy.

I hadn't seen a dog before until your trick back in the forest. Cows seem way out of my wheelhouse.

[nadine_he_loves]

A wolf. I turn into a wolf. Close to a dog, but not the same thing.

Cows are...they're a produce animal, they make milk and they have a lot of useable meat. Their skin is tanned and used to make things. They were all over on Earth.

[thearchangel]

Okay. Wolves are... almost dogs. But not the same thing. Understood.

And that meat is - it's steak, right? That's what you call it? What's milk?

[nadine_he_loves]

So I guess we didn't take our animals to space with us...

Yeah, steak is a cut of meat from a cow. Milk is that white liquid I put in my tea.

You know what, why don't you come over some evening and we'll go over common domestic animals and animal products. A lot of them exist here, too. Like horses. And actual cows.

[thearchangel]

Depends. You sure brought hamsters and tropical fish. But that and a few bird species are about all that's allowed on the Citadel - space station I lived and worked on for a long time.

Also Shepard had both. Kind of liked the fish.

How can refuse an invitation like that? Be nice to know what I'm eating these days.

[nadine_he_loves]

Hamsters? Really? Should have brought guinea pigs.

Yeah I have fish. They're not exactly pets, they're to keep the microorganism biome stable in my aquatic garden tank, but they're relaxing to watch.

Yes that's something you should know, Garrus.

[thearchangel]

Shepard insists it's a "space hamster". Not just a hamster. Little guy's pretty cute, though.

I think that's why a lot of people keep fish. Something about algae tanks too. The fish on the Normandy were pretty much just for fun though.

Hah - I'm mostly kidding. I know the basic things. Specifics would be good though.

[nadine_he_loves]

Well I guess if it's in space...

There's just something soothing about it. And I have a bigger tank, it's like an aquarium. When I can't sleep, getting stoned and watching the fish really helps.

Specifics are still important.