abraxasnet | @everyone | dated to when the creatures started showing up

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@everyone | dated to when the creatures started showing up

Hey, so - head's up. Not sure what's going on here, but if anyone sees a weird looking animal, four legs, two little arms coming out of the chest? Watch your wallet. I'm serious. Those things steal your credits - or whatever you're using as currency here. No clue how they do it. I mean, they're not dangerous, they're just irritating. They're from our neck of the universe. I think humans call them "shifty-looking cows". That's it. PSA from the milky way.

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...

Why the hell do we call these things cows?

SPACE cow. space

Do you milk them??

What? No. Typically I get by on just not shooting them.

Do you want to milk them?

No. But normally you can milk a cow. Maybe that's why they're named that. For milk reasons.

[She had... genuinely never considered that.]

I've never considered that.

[And she never wants to consider it again.]

Look, if you wanna figure this out, be my guest. As far as I know, they were probably named by some random xeno-biologist that thought they were funny. Just don't blame me when anything you got in your pockets isn't there when you leave.

Edited (my dumb fat fingers) 2023-07-24 17:32 (UTC)

I'll pass. I got no interest in space critters. I was just pointing out that they can probably be milked.

... Milk?

Yeah. Milk comes from cows. Well, most milk, anyway.

[And thanks to Nadine...]

You get a liquid. From an animal.

Yes? That's what dairy is. What, are you a vegan?

Uh, no. Non-human, actually.

And your... species? doesn't use "animal" products?

Don't get touchy, I just don't know what you are or what your people consider to be animals.

No, we do. But the 'milk' thing is uh. That's new.

Y'all don't know what milk is? Like, any kinda milk? How do mamas feed their babies where you're from?

(no subject)

thearchangel - 2023-07-29 04:23 (UTC) - Expand

I have no idea. Did people forget what cows are?

You're asking the wrong guy. I hadn't seen a dog before until your trick back in the forest. Cows seem way out of my wheelhouse.

A wolf. I turn into a wolf. Close to a dog, but not the same thing.

Cows are...they're a produce animal, they make milk and they have a lot of useable meat. Their skin is tanned and used to make things. They were all over on Earth.

Okay. Wolves are... almost dogs. But not the same thing. Understood. And that meat is - it's steak, right? That's what you call it? What's milk?

So I guess we didn't take our animals to space with us...

Yeah, steak is a cut of meat from a cow. Milk is that white liquid I put in my tea.

You know what, why don't you come over some evening and we'll go over common domestic animals and animal products. A lot of them exist here, too. Like horses. And actual cows.

Depends. You sure brought hamsters and tropical fish. But that and a few bird species are about all that's allowed on the Citadel - space station I lived and worked on for a long time. Also Shepard had both. Kind of liked the fish. How can refuse an invitation like that? Be nice to know what I'm eating these days.

Hamsters? Really? Should have brought guinea pigs.

Yeah I have fish. They're not exactly pets, they're to keep the microorganism biome stable in my aquatic garden tank, but they're relaxing to watch.

Yes that's something you should know, Garrus.

Shepard insists it's a "space hamster". Not just a hamster. Little guy's pretty cute, though. I think that's why a lot of people keep fish. Something about algae tanks too. The fish on the Normandy were pretty much just for fun though. Hah - I'm mostly kidding. I know the basic things. Specifics would be good though.

Well I guess if it's in space...

There's just something soothing about it. And I have a bigger tank, it's like an aquarium. When I can't sleep, getting stoned and watching the fish really helps.

Specifics are still important.

Space cow, space hamster... It's a theme. Yeah. Plus it was always kind of fun to see them all swim after the food pellets. Yes ma'am. Here's hoping I'm not a slow learner.

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