to: all, with apologies to nico di angelo

[areou]

( the message is deliberately written in ancient greek. for most summoned, the network will auto-translate, but she's hoping there might be others who recognize the original text. )

WILL SOLACE COME RETRIEVE YOUR EMOTIONAL SUPPORT GOTH I'M NOT HIS BABYSITTER

( helpfully, she adds an illustration that no one asked for: )



( then, because nico seriously needs more friends and it's her duty as former head counselor of the ares cabin to embarrass any and all younger campers: )

↖  BTW THIS IS NICO
HE LOVES LONG WALKS THROUGH THE UNDERWORLD AND BROODING IN GRAVEYARDS
HE'S SPOKEN FOR BUT I'M SURE HE'LL BE THE AFTERLIFE OF YOUR NEXT PARTY
CHALLENGE HIM TO A GAME OF MYTHOMAGIC TODAY!!!

ALSO IF ANYONE OUT THERE HAS SEEN THESE DEMIGODS CONTACT ME ASAP
LOOKS LIKE ZEUS IS SUPER FUCKING PISSED AGAIN AND WE NEED A GAMEPLAN

( more shitty doodles follow, this time vaguely resembling percy and annabeth, although this time she labels them: )



— CLARISSE LA RUE, DRAKON-SLAYER, DAUGHTER OF ARES

( she figures she may as well cover all her bases here since all of this feels like a ren faire on steroids anyway.

ooc | threadjacking is more than welcome and, frankly, encouraged. let's all go hog boar wild. 🫡 )

Comments

ME TOOOOOOO 🙊🙊🙊

[areou]

( apollo can probably hear her laughing, wherever he is, because she is cracking tf up. tears in her eyes, bro. )

Oh, buddy, you have no idea
There was a whole war about the fact that they don't
Ignoring us was their favorite hobby for several millennia
Not that I've seen my dad since the end of the war, so they're still pretty bad at the whole visitation thing
But now they're at least supposed to send a godgram to let their kids know who their godly parent is

[unwings]

And you, the children, won this war against the gods?
With angels, the offspring of a human and angel relationship is often more powerful than the angel that sired them. Is it the same with the children of Greek gods?

[areou]

Well, it wasn't against the gods, exactly
More like against grumpy great-grandpa Kronos and his army of monsters and brainwashed demigods who wanted to overthrow Olympus and reshape the world because daddy didn't love me enough
Technically, we saved the gods' royal butts from getting totally annihilated

Wait, more powerful? How the hell does that work? Shouldn't mortal blood, like, dilute that power?
I mean, demigods are only a tiny fraction as powerful as their godly parents
Unless they're one of Zeus, Hades, or Poseidon's kids
I can't even summon one fucking zombie warrior without praying to my dad for assistance, but Nico can raise a fucking undead army by sneezing or whatever
Don't even get me started on the whole legacy bullshit where apparently some kids can inherit more than one god's power through their bloodline
Like, how the fuck is that fair?
The Big Three were supposed to quit having demigod kids because they're too damn powerful (fun fact: their kids started World War II), but that pact lasted for like five seconds because gods do not know how to keep it in their pants

[unwings]

For beings only a fraction of the power of the gods, you’ve certainly accomplished incredible things
Your parents should be grateful

The human soul is more powerful than many give it credit for.
A nephilim grown fully into their power can sunder worlds.
Though the child of an archangel would be monumentally more powerful than that of a seraph.
Hence, their creation is strictly forbidden.
Most are culled before they reach that point.

The differences of our worlds is startling, though I’m unsurprised to learn supernatural forces had a hand in world wars in your reality as well.
Does your father often answer your prayers for, um, zombie warriors?

[areou]

Yeah, they fucking should be, thank you
I'd say they're working on it, but they're gods, so I doubt it
Gratitude doesn't come naturally to 4000 year old beings who haven't had an Eat Pray Love near-death mortal experience and learned what it's like to be a Real Boy

( looking at you, apollo. )

Sorry, did you say "culled"?

My dad rarely answers my prayers, period
He only made an exception that one time because if I failed my quest it would make him look bad

[unwings]

The older a being is, the more stuck in their ways.
With some exceptions.
I was roughly 2 billion when I found myself rethinking the very foundations of my creation.

I did. It was on God's order.
It isn't a thing I'm proud of, but it's the truth.
I've been told, in a couple years, I'll become an adoptive father to a Nephilim I had the chance to meet here.
He's a kind boy, compassionate. Innocent.
I imagine I'd take on all of Heaven's army to keep him safe.

[areou]

Did you also have an Eat Pray Love near-death mortal experience

Guess he'll be pretty lucky to have someone fighting for him, then

( meanwhile, the greek pantheon simply pretends not to see their children 90% of the time, let alone fight on their behalf. )

[unwings]

I don't eat.
Well, yes, I did eat at the time. There was an attempt to pray, though the angel that answered was not happy to see me.

He has at least three of us, though I doubt he truly needs us all.

[ that boy stupid powerful, but like hell cas won't throw himself on a train for him anyway. ]