to: all, with apologies to nico di angelo

[areou]

( the message is deliberately written in ancient greek. for most summoned, the network will auto-translate, but she's hoping there might be others who recognize the original text. )

WILL SOLACE COME RETRIEVE YOUR EMOTIONAL SUPPORT GOTH I'M NOT HIS BABYSITTER

( helpfully, she adds an illustration that no one asked for: )



( then, because nico seriously needs more friends and it's her duty as former head counselor of the ares cabin to embarrass any and all younger campers: )

↖  BTW THIS IS NICO
HE LOVES LONG WALKS THROUGH THE UNDERWORLD AND BROODING IN GRAVEYARDS
HE'S SPOKEN FOR BUT I'M SURE HE'LL BE THE AFTERLIFE OF YOUR NEXT PARTY
CHALLENGE HIM TO A GAME OF MYTHOMAGIC TODAY!!!

ALSO IF ANYONE OUT THERE HAS SEEN THESE DEMIGODS CONTACT ME ASAP
LOOKS LIKE ZEUS IS SUPER FUCKING PISSED AGAIN AND WE NEED A GAMEPLAN

( more shitty doodles follow, this time vaguely resembling percy and annabeth, although this time she labels them: )



— CLARISSE LA RUE, DRAKON-SLAYER, DAUGHTER OF ARES

( she figures she may as well cover all her bases here since all of this feels like a ren faire on steroids anyway.

ooc | threadjacking is more than welcome and, frankly, encouraged. let's all go hog boar wild. 🫡 )

Comments

[demigoth]

Think about everything Clarisse says. She’s not sneaky. She doesn’t sugarcoat anything. Julie’s Senator Palpatine, but you don’t have to be Amidala.

That Jesper person was sending me messages about her and your boss and someone named Mags. Is that your landlord? He made out like he worked for them and wanted to protect your job. I told him to talk to YOU instead.

[sonofacesius]

[The way to his heart was 100% through Star Wars metaphors.]

You think she's going to try something? More than she already has?

And if I'm Amidala I think we all know what that makes you. And considering you already told me you'd go on a date with Darth Vader.....

Well I'm glad you're learning to love yourself Nico.

Seriously though, Mags won't be an issue. She doesn't pick sides. She's the head of the Inn I stay at. You can stay there too if you need a place. I don't know Jesper but...I can reach out to Nadine. Maybe she can find out more about what's going on.

And Nico? I do have to be Amidala. Let's try to have a few things end differently though, okay?

[demigoth]

If I knew that, I'D be the son of Apollo. I just know what it's like to have someone steamroll a conversation, and I'm not trusting that again.

Shut up. You know that's not what I meant.

We both know that means I have to have your back even if you don't want me to.

[sonofacesius]

You always have my back Nico. Just as I always have yours. We're a team.

With any luck I can smooth things over. Talk to Nadine. Besides, I'm not completely defenseless.

[Don't you remember him hitting monsters with rocks Nico? It was a fine choice!]

Unless you're talking about like zombie bodyguards? If there's anyway we can avoid those, can we? I'm not saying no. I'm just saying...please?

[demigoth]

What, you think her Achilles heel is the Care Bear Stare? Or bad whistling?

[ You see what's not on the list of your silly top hits, Will? Hitting things with rocks. ]

I meant me.

But I didn't NOT mean zombie bodyguards. They're sturdier than skeletons.

[sonofacesius]

Both of which can be extremely effective! I bet dogs have warned each other about my whistle.

[Hitting things with rocks can also be effective. Will hitting things with rocks though? Not that effective.]

See, I've learned things. Zombies totally outrank skeletons.

But I think they'd probably creep out the patients and I'd rather have you.

[demigoth]

Dogs don't talk and your patients need to learn to appreciate the full cycle of life. Also people are different and unique and something your dad would put in a haiku.

[sonofacesius]

yeah, that is totally something dad would put in a haiku.

Okay, I can live with the zombie bodyguards.