To: Everyone; From: Anonymous

[endcaller]

[At first Fandaniel wasn't sure what to make of the text that sometimes swam into his vision. Since his arrival he's learned about the supposed connection the Summoned have to the Singularity and has decided that this strange way of communicating must be based on this connection.

He isn't sure what exactly this system is or how it works but he decides to test it anyway. What scientist could resist?

His message to the other Summoned is meant entirely to test this communication method and satisfy his curiosity. He is not just trying to entertain himself at someone else's expense, surely not...

The following bits of text are in excessively flowery cursive that appears every few minutes over the course of more than an hour. The disjointedness is meant to be purposefully irritating.

With focus, he disguises his identity, making himself anonymous.]

Nobody every listens to me.

Nobody ever notices me.

Everywhere I go I am ignored.

It is hardly fair.

I am, after all, the greatest story teller among my people. Did you know that? Of course not.

Here is a story.

This is the story of an enchanted kingdom, ruled by a wise and powerful emperor.

He commanded a vast empire and the most powerful military in the world but do you know what he valued most?

No, not coin, not land, but flowers. He acquired flowers from every conquered nation and brought them back to his gardens.

But there was one flower he did not have. It was a Reekblossom, a blossoming weed that smelled of sewage but was highly valuable due to its rarity.

It thrived only on a mountain in the one bit of land this emperor did not command. The nation that held the mountain could not match his military might but did have itself surrounded by a magical barrier maintained by the power of its tutelary deities.

How could he pierce it? Of course you know the answer... he could not.

So he conquered the entire rest of the world and then what did he do? Did he sit in satisfaction upon his throne?

No, that was not his nature.

That flower still haunted him. Finally, he decided he would turn his army upon the barrier.

For a thousand years his weapons pummeled the shield, then, at last, they pierced it!

His army invaded the land, and he was finally able to obtain the Reekblossom.

Overjoyed to have the last flower he needed for his garden, the emperor returned to his palace and planted it in the--

Hey!

You're ignoring me, aren't you?

Every time.

Comments

also sent to everyone

[princessvegas]

[ The following response shows up once, in extremely large, bold letters. She immediately turns off her messages after sending this, but she's pretty sure she speaks for literally everyone else who's seeing these stupid texts. ]

HEY.

SHUT THE FUCK UP, ASSHOLE.

[a_better_man]

Did you MEAN to send this to everyone? Because I promise we all did not need to read that.

[techmaturgy]

[this is very funny but also maybe he feels a little bad about how thoroughly this guy is getting dunked on. so.]

Was it worth it?

private; fandaniel

[bravers]

[See, this is a tough one. Because. Yeah. He kind of gets the first couple of lines. ...Or at least some part of him does. Underneath everything else. It feels, vaguely, like a string being pulled to something that... is important.

Somehow.
His interest is piqued, and he doesn't know why.

But then the mention of stories...
Yeah, no.
And then the story happens, and while what seems like all the letters in the world is flashing in front of his vision...]


You wanna not be ignored, try not filling the comms system full of crap.

totally sent to everyone

[frontlinetitties]

Do you know what would have made this story better? Some bangin' babes. Babes who lost their clothes in some kind of tragic, flower-related accident. That would get people's attention.