( abruptly, she realizes in her relay of recent events, she'd left out the part about why she left camp. "since winter break" could mean anything. annabeth probably assumed clarisse meant a quest or another assignment from chiron. but now — it seems silly, embarrassing even, to have to admit that she did think about college. that she'd been doing it for a whole semester until they were summoned here. that, truthfully, clarisse had only considered it with annabeth's encouragement. college is the last thing clarisse ever thought she'd try, or be any good at. she's still figuring out if she is any good at it.
acclimating to the mortal world on top of taking classes that make her head spin has been a lot more difficult than she ever could have imagined. some days, she wants to quit and drop out, but camp didn't raise her to be a quitter. not many demigods even make it to college (she thinks about beckendorf, his plans to attend nyu, and her chest aches). so regardless of how hard it is, and how she hates it more often than not, she's doing it as much for herself as she is for all the kids who never got the opportunity. at least, she will if they ever make it back home. )
I guess I should pay more attention in lectures, then
( a few minutes pass, as if she's typing and deleting the same thing over and over, only she's trying very hard not to think about the message too hard. eventually, she renlents to her own thoughts: )
private(ly falling to the floor in my feelings)
acclimating to the mortal world on top of taking classes that make her head spin has been a lot more difficult than she ever could have imagined. some days, she wants to quit and drop out, but camp didn't raise her to be a quitter. not many demigods even make it to college (she thinks about beckendorf, his plans to attend nyu, and her chest aches). so regardless of how hard it is, and how she hates it more often than not, she's doing it as much for herself as she is for all the kids who never got the opportunity. at least, she will if they ever make it back home. )
I guess I should pay more attention in lectures, then
( a few minutes pass, as if she's typing and deleting the same thing over and over, only she's trying very hard not to think about the message too hard. eventually, she renlents to her own thoughts: )
Thanks, for explaining